A government which should have been struck off several years ago is still being allowed to mistreat pharmacies.
'We are sick and dying,' croaked Olivia Holt, a pharmacist from Dottingham. 'The government continues to misdiagnose us all with War in Ukraine Syndrome, when we've all got Brexititus. We can't get the drugs for the communities we serve, and that's a bitter pill shortage to swallow.
'Many ticker signs outside chemists are not well enough to display the correct time. Others are showing temperatures which are way too high. This means we are in breach of the Green Cross Code. It's no wonder everyone is feeling rundown.
'Some of us are so close to our demise now, that we are seeing those sunlit uplands.'