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You’ve Got Mail 2: History Repeats Itself


The romantic comedy movie You’ve Got Mail is getting a sequel, after almost thirty years. The original film is much loved and is still frequently viewed on streaming services.


In the 1998 film a small bookshop, run by Meg Ryan, is put out of business by an all consuming chain of book superstores run by Tom Hanks. The message of the film is to accept change and move with the times. Meg Ryan is forced to close her bookshop and, after being comprehensively catfished by Tom Hanks over email, finally accepts her fate, and hooks up with him.


Tom Hanks has been offered a role in the sequel and is said to be considering it. But Meg Ryan is out of the running and industry insiders say that Jeff Bezos or Mark Zuckerberg could take the role of the villain this time.


In the remake, Tom Hanks’ superstore chain Fox Books is put out of business by the all consuming internet, run by Jeff Bezos or Mark Zuckerberg. The message of the film is to accept change and move with the times, blah blah blah.


Critics worry that the romantic tension of the original film could easily be lost in the remake, with some believing that neither Jeff Bezos nor Mark Zuckerberg are 'hot enough' for the role.


Chickens denounce Bezos over endorsement debacle

A spokesbird for the American Chicken Alliance has excoriated Washington Post owner Jeff Bezos’ ‘pathetic cowardice’ for his decision, apparently under pressure from Donald Trump, to spike the paper’s endorsement of Kamala Harris for president. ‘Comical cravenness is our brand, not yours!’ clucked Henny Penny on her weekly podcast. ‘Stay in your lane, Bezos!’


Penny’s statement came as no surprise to Alfred Newman, Professor of Poultry Politics at King’s College, London. ‘Chickens are very conscious of having cornered the market on groundless panic,’ Newman said. ‘In their view, Bezos’ hysterical fright is kind of like trademark infringement.’


More puzzling is why Bezos, owner of Amazon, caved in the first place. ‘Christ, he could lose $7 billion in his couch and not miss it,’ Penny clucked. ‘If he’s not going to stand up to that big orange man-turd, who the hell will?’


Consistent with its recent practice, the American Chicken Alliance has not officially endorsed a presidential candidate, but Trump’s ravenous appetite for chicken nuggets is well known in the community. The organization has set up ‘Eet mor Bief’ booths at Harris campaign events, but the initiative has yet to take flight with the public.




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