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Writers of the hit scripted reality show “Selling Washington” have been criticised for resorting to stereotypes by having the show’s two biggest bitches, Donella and Elonia, fall out with each other.


“We’ve seen it a million times in shows like this,” complained cultural commentator Lorna Putz. “Two permatanned, overly made up airheads, who obsess about their appearance but somehow still manage not to be attractive, start out as friends but soon have a huge falling out and start sniping at each other. Don’t the writers realise what an insulting stereotype that is?”


The writers retorted that the show is only showing a heightened version of who these people really are. “It’s not like they’re actors, playing characters who are nothing like them. They don’t remotely have the talent for that.


“Besides, it’s what the public want. All the way back to Dynasty having to include at least one catfight in every season, as it sent the ratings through the roof like nothing else.”


Asked whether this meant we’d be seeing Donella and Elonia coming to blows in a future episode, the writers laughed and said “Well, we might not want to take it that far. I mean, one of them has a nuclear arsenal, the other a fleet of space rockets. If they really got down to it, I’m not sure there’d be anyone left to watch.


“No, we’re thinking more of a plotline where one of them starts palling around with Kimjongunia to make the other one jealous.”


image from lockjaw



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The Deary-me Leader Kim Jong-un celebrated the successful firing of another missile into the ocean this week. 'This is a great day for phytoplankton. For too long the running dogs of the American imperialists have oppressed the little guys at the bottom of the food chain, gobbling phytoplankton with no regard for its rights. Well, we showed them.'


Journalists asked how Americans are oppressing single-celled marine plant life. 'They banned eating whales, which reduced predatorial pressure on zooplankton, thus increasing zooplankton numbers and reducing phytoplankton in a systemic response. Don’t they teach ecological population dynamics to journalists anymore?'


When questioned further about whether a North Korean missile could really distinguish between friendly phytoplankton and zooplanktonic foes, Kim Jong-un was philosophical. 'Even one’s own must be sacrificed in war, just ask uncle Vlad.'


Author: Dogular


Image from Pixabay by FotoshopTofs


First published 10 May 2022


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