MPs condemn the existence of Rap

Raged one Minister, against the machine: 'It's political and offensive but more importantly it's in rhyming couplets. What's that about? It's like an angry Dr Seuss. Rap is poetry for poor people and we won't stand for it. Poetry or poor people!

'We condemn the controversial rap group Kneecap, for deliberately rapping in a controversial way. It's almost as if it was intentional. How dare they court publicity by appearing in public. Using words to make you think and feel! Whatever next? Phat beats to make you move?

'We appeal to all festivals to give youngsters the music they want - Gregorian Chants. Nothing to dance to and all the words are in Latin. Or the old classics that your Nan would sing, like NWA's Fuk Da Police.'

Image: Gordon Cowie (@gcowie) | Unsplash Photo Community

MPS reject offer of time and a half wages for working last Saturday

MPs are insisting that the time and a half payment for Saturday work, they found written on this week’s pay packet is derisory; and unless it’s made up to double time, they won’t turn up on Saturdays again for the foreseeable future, even if Russia invades.

A now, non-existent, transgender spokesbeing for the MPs' union told Newsbiscuit “This is a complete mockery of what our members expected from the Labour Party; and the Tory faction of our membership in particular, feel completely betrayed in allowing them to take over government,”

image from pixabay

MPs demand double expenses for working Saturdays

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