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Despite mixed reviews, critics have praised the performance of actor Steve Vaughan, one saying that "his physicality perfectly captures Savile’s creepy decrepitude", helped by the "appallingly tacky" tracksuits and red-lensed glasses provided by costume designer Deborah Jenkins. They also admired the catchiness of the songs "Now then, now then", "Jingle jangle, jewellery jewellery" and "Come back to my dressing room after the show".


However, many also complained of the 'elephant in the room' the show glosses over - the fact that the 'much loved national treasure' turned out to be a massive pervert and serial abuser of women, children and even corpses.


'We did think about a more honest portrayal,' said producer Abe Greenbacks. 'It’s not like there’s no precedent for showing child abuse in a musical - they did it in "Tommy", after all.'


'But we just felt it limits the number of people who’d come to see the show, so I’d make less money," he concluded, before asking his PA to 'try and make that sound a bit less mercenary before you send it out.'


The show stands in a long line of sanitised accounts of appalling people, including "Bad" (about Michael Jackson), "Springtime for Hitler" and "Pol Pot on Ice".



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Initially thought to be case of hologram on hologram violence, a man with three dimensions has now been arrested for the 1996 murder of Tupac Shakur.


The case is shining a light on other musical crimes.


Shaggy's deceptively simple defence of 'it wasn't me' may need further corroboration given that his honey came in and caught him red handed. She caught him on the counter and saw him banging on the sofa. She even caught him on camera. Donald Trump's lawyers are watching closely.


After pleading guilty to shooting the sheriff, Eric Clapton must fight the charges of shooting the deputy from his jail cell. Again Donald Trump's lawyers are watching closely.


Meanwhile Justin Bieber has been sent to Guantanamo Bay for enhanced interrogation, because you can't sing when you're being waterboarded.





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The palace has conformed songs from the illustrious career of Andrew Lloyd Fibber will feature at the King's coronation. It is believed the crowning and anointment with oil will be accompanied by the song ‘Don’t Massage me Marge and Tina’, a smash hit for Fibber in 1976. Here is a full list of musicals that will feature, as played by the Royal Philharmonic Orchestra in Westminster Abbey.


Andrew and his Amazing Technicolor Alibi (1968)

The hit musical that launched his career, featuring such classic hits as ‘Any Excuse Will Do’.


Jesus Christ Super-injunction (1970)

Not much we can say about that one.


Cats (1981)

In which the lead singer forgets the words to that timeless bittersweet ballad ‘Memory’.


Pizza Express (1984)

A roller-skating spectacular. The audience watch with bated breath, waiting for members of a stellar cast to fall flat on their faces


The Phantom of the Night Club (1986)

Performers stand around, not doing very much and insisting they weren’t sure why they turned up in the first place because nightclubs aren’t really their thing. Features the hit song ‘Nosweat Boulevard’.


School of York (2015)

An ageing rocker is thrown out of his band but lands a job teaching kids. The show closed following complaints.


Sarah Brightman and Paul Chuckle have been booked to sing alongside the King in outlandish sequin costumes. Tickets are available online or from a booth in Leicester Square. Andrew Lloyd Fibber musicals may contain flashing images.



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