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Essex pub raided for not displaying right wing memorabilia


A pub in Essex has been raided by police after customers complained there were no right-wing offensive memorabilia on display.


'No swastikas, no golliwogs, no framed portraits of Nigel Farage in sight,' said a Detective Constable today.


'Obviously we tried to give them advice on the right way to display any golliwogs they might find - preferably with a correctly tied noose around their necks, but they weren't up for listening. We pointed out we had better things to do with our time, what with raping and abusing law abiding citizens, but zero interest. We tried to give them leaflets on how to be racist, some Britain First tee shirts we had going spare, but they wouldn't take any notice.


'Of course, we've arrested them, charged them with wasting police time. We also noticed they had RNLI collection containers on the bar so we've charged them with offences related to funding terrorist organisations as well,' he added.


photo: https://pixabay.com/users/kbha-9658148/

Study finds Godwin's Law actually a Nazi invention



It has long been accepted wisdom that the first person in a debate or argument to resort to accusing someone of acting like a Nazi has lost the argument, and the concept is generally attributed to Mike Godwin in 1990. New research has discovered that the so-called Godwin's Law actually goes back a lot further.


'In 1939 the generals governing Poland are recorded as calling Adolf Hitler a Nazi, and they certainly lost that argument,' said an expert today. ' Apparently the French and Belgium leaderships called him a Nazi about that time, too. Holland, well, they could have used more circumspect language,' he suggested. 'Perhaps if these leaders of countries had moderated their language, perhaps like Gary Lineker, World War Two might have been avoided,' he added.


The expert view regarding the debate about the UK migrant deportation process that has resulted in the likes of Priti Patel and Suella Braverman being likened to Nazis is that Godwin's Law doesn't apply. 'If it walks like a duck,' suggested the expert.





Government shows how unlike Nazis they are by swiftly and ruthlessly silencing dissent



The non-Nazi credentials of the Conservative Government were unmistakeable when they forced someone off air for not blindly towing the Government line.


“This quelling of free-speech is so unlike anything Nazis would do that I’m insulted you’d make that comparison” said Suella Braverman, Minister for Propaganda and Public Enlightenment.


Some people have said that any TV presenter who implied the Government was in any way like Nazis was not impartial and that they should be replaced with an unquestioning Government mouthpiece. These were exactly the same people who loudly boast that they’d have bravely spoken up in the face of Nazi censorship.


Preparations are currently in full-swing at Whitehall for Not Act Like A Nazi Day, on April 30th - Hitler’s Birthday. The celebration has been introduced by the Government to prove they’re not like Nazis by brutally persecuting anyone who says they are, then saying “see”.


Asked if the Tory Government was efficiently evil like the Nazis, a leading Historian of 20th century Germany said “not really…the Nazis were efficient.”




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