Exploiting a loophole in their plan to pay asylum seekers to return abroad, cash strapped holiday makers have registered themselves as Illegal immigrants. A family of four can now have a free holiday - provided they are happy for the location to be Afghanistan.
Nigel Farage will personally book your air flight and escort you, by the ear, through customs. £2bn has been put aside for the plan, which should just about cover his drinks tab. Reform claims the holidays will be all inclusive - all you can eat, so long as it is a Red Cross parcel.
The party says it would build removal centres - similar to Butlins. Detaining up to 24,000 people - so a bit like Southern Rail. And Farage has promised to charter flights five times a day, more if you are a stag do.
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