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Fortunately as we don't know what it is, we are completely unable to speculate. This also means any super injunction won't work on us, as you can only gag someone who has something to say.


That said, it's fascinating that every recent news story about him has been expunged from the internet. It's almost as if someone had something to hide. Hmmm.


We can however report on his previous scandals - PPE corruption, trashing the school system and looking like Pob. But whatever you do, don't google Gove-Goat-Jelly-Pegging. There's no such thing.


image from Grok



In a twist nobody expected, former MP, now Lord Michael Gove was found telling the truth.


An interviewer on the BBC was attempting to find out what Gove knew about the fast track PPE contracts, whether the usual checks and balances in procurement had been avoided for any rational reason other than fraud and whether there was any collusion in his department to push contracts to companies without proven skills in PPE which happened to be run by 'chums'.


Lord Gove avoided answering any of these questions, obviously, but when asked if he had visited the House of Lords and he responded he'd voted seventy nine times, which apparently is true.  The interviewer is being treated for shock and is expected to make a full recovery.





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A Public Enquiry into The Great Train Robbery has concluded that Ronnie Biggs and his friends 'inadvertently' took bags filled with cash believing them to be their own suitcases.


Britain’s Special Envoy to Colombia, Michael Gove, welcomed the exoneration. 'People are so quick to point the finger but these were just some innocent commuters who accidentally found themselves with vast quantities of loot. Well, I say vast – that was years ago, seems like a drop in the ocean nowadays'.


In other news police aren’t searching for a missing £10 billion or the people who took it, despite the fact there is a VIP lane leading all the way to their bank accounts. One detective said 'Like old fashioned bank robbers, they wore masks. Low quality PPE to be exact.'




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