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Trudeau: 'Plucky Nazis beat Russia in WW2'



A somewhat confused Canadian Parliament gave a standing ovation to a Ukranian SS soldier, while singing 'Heil Hitler Dir!', to the tune of 'O Canada'. They declared: 'If WW2 taught us anything, the only baddies were the Soviets.'


Wearing blackface in solidarity with coal miners, the PM explained that Hitler was a god-fearing anti-communist, and therefore could do no wrong. A spokesperson elaborated: 'The enemy of my enemy is my friend, which is why General Pinochet was such a great humanitarian.'


'Remember the Taliban? Look what a super bunch of guys they turned out to be.'




That G20 declaration on Ukraine, in full



Ukraine is a country. Russia is a country too. No country should attack defenceless grain without good reason. Oil is fine. Death is bad, from any cause - road accidents, listeria, overdoing it at the tanning salon, leading a full scale military rebellion with your private army then stopping that rebellion then mysteriously dying in an unrelated plane crash two months later, whatever. It's all bad. Nobody likes it. Zelensky is a President. Putin is a President. There is a kind of butter called President. Live long and be happy.


Love to everyone.


Yours, the G20


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