top of page

ree



Do TV schedulers copy each other? It certainly seems that way, as the airwaves this autumn are filled with game shows that have a political twist.


Here is a quick rundown.


No Deal or No Deal - a game show that challenges contestants to fix the Northern Ireland protocol


Tipping Point - contestants win prizes by correctly guessing where raw sewage is being discharged, and in what quantity


Beat the Chaser - government ministers don't have to answer any questions, as long as they can stay ahead of the chaser. Dominic Cummings stars.


Who Wants to be a Millionaire - a quiz show for people who want to win government PPE contracts, often by phoning a friend


Tenable - a competition to find out which of the Tory leadership candidates are Number Ten-able


Total Wipeout - another competition to find the next Tory leader, but with the tantalising prospect of some serious injuries


Jeux sans Frontieres - England, Wales, Scotland, Northern Ireland and Sark compete to be crowned European Champions


Insert Name Here - Sue Perkins leads the search for the next Tory leader

Changing Rooms - Keir Starmer has to redecorate 10 Downing Street with a budget of £4.50


Countdown - contestants try to guess the date of the next General Election

This is my House - Tory hopefuls try to convince Lord Sugar that they could live at Number 10


Two shows didn't make the cut. Political Naked Attraction was judged repulsive by focus groups and all tapes have been confiscated by party whips. And although pilot episodes of Political Pointless were filmed, they will not be aired because contestants found it far too easy to spot pointless policies.



ree

Scientists now understand how a tiny creature from long ago evolved to doing away with an anus.


Professor Magnus Trout from the Isle of Wight Institute of Natural Sciences explains:-


“During the course of the development of life on Earth, nature tries all types of combinations – including those that end up in evolutionary dead ends – if you’ll pardon the pun. So for every creature such as this, there will be other mutations that will continue if they are successful.


We know, for example, that there is a creature that is diametrically opposite to this one. It is all anus – ‘Totalus Arseholeus’. It can be found in all areas of the Conservative Party but particularly prime examples can be found in government. It specialises in excreting over anyone and everyone.


This creature is a distinct risk to the survival of the human race, with priority given to private sector shareholder profits, as opposed to realistically tackling global warming.


There is a faint hope for the future of the rest of mankind. The withdrawal of its usual nourishment – corrupt Covid contracts and Russian oligarch donations – may mean that it eventually becomes extinct




bottom of page