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Child traffickers welcome MP's support

This much maligned industry, had struggled with supply lines during Covid but said that the Government had now guaranteed a constant flow of vulnerable teenagers. Remarked one smuggler: 'If it wasn't for Parliament and the friends of Prince Andrew, we'd struggle to find a market for all these hapless teenagers. Leaving them unguarded in hotels was definitely helpful, but the big bonus was when MPs agreed to unlock the doors at night.

One MP, Jonathan Gullis - the answer to whatever happened to the 1980's white dog turd - confirmed the fault lay with the victims for being refugees. Gullis is seen as a keen advocate of kidnapping children to teach them a valuable life lesson - however short that life now is.

A minister confirmed: '4,600 unaccompanied child asylum seekers arrive every year and its our job to find them a safe place to live - if by 'safe' you mean a sweatshop or brothel.'

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