Voters in the Unites States breathed a sigh of relief upon hearing a mentally incompetent elderly man had dropped out of the presidential race. Sadly, the relief was short-lived, as it turned out it was actually Joe Biden.
One disillusioned New England voter was quoted as saying, 'I don't think anyone was of the impression Biden's best years were ahead of him, but we're still left with the babbling, fraud convict and sex offender from the Apprentice? Really? The founding fathers would want their names purged from this project faster than Gary Glitter's backing band.'
Whilst the nation at large was relieved that there were 50% fewer candidates on the ballot box whose mental state could only be described as relentlessly confused, the general feeling remained that when it came to running an incredibly powerful country with nuclear weapons and a raft of top-tier prestige TV shows, even one unbalanced nut-bar on the ballot still seemed like too many.
At press time, hopes that Trump would treat his new democratic rival, a black woman, with the bare minimum threshold of human respect were dashed by researching almost anything Trump has said in his time in or out of office on matters of race, women and human beings that disagreed with him.
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