Face Eating Leopard sets out leadership campaign
- Wrenfoe
- 8 hours ago
- 1 min read
Conservative voters were energised today by the candidacy of Face Eating Leopard, as he stood on a platform of face eating, low taxes, and further face eating. Speaking to a room of packed journalists, or ‘lunch’ as he referred to them, he said: ‘I feel I have something to offer the country – which is very specific dietary requirement.’
Already ahead of Liz Truss, the leopard insisted his devouring of noses would be more appealing. ‘Just because I sound and look like a leopard, does not mean I cannot change my spots. Contrary to rumours I will not be eating your face…well, maybe just the once’.
image from pixabay
First published 17 Jul 2022
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