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Writer's pictureFrank Optional

Man standing outside station with a sign snags job as NHS chief executive


Only a few month’s ago, Brian Mitchell’s life looked bleak. He had been recently sacked from his street sweeping job and was struggling to feed himself and make ends meet.


Desperate for work, Brian pitched himself outside Westminster Underground Station, carrying a sign that said: “My name is Brian. Give me money so I can eat. Or a job. Whatever.”


Within an hour, Brian found himself in charge of the entire NHS.


“A nice man called Sajid said he liked my initiative and would I like to be put in charge of all of Britain’s public healthcare? That we he could blame me after they sacked him.”


Brian has been running the NHS for a week now and is rushing to catch up.


“I have no idea what’s going on, to be honest” he says, “but they tell me that’s pretty common. Sometimes I wonder if I made the right decision! Still, whenever they come to me with a major problem I always say the same thing:


Have you tried standing outside a station with a sign? Or: Have you tried banging a saucepan with a wooden spoon?


Everyone tells me I fit right in!"






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