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 Migrant NHS staff clapped – clapped in irons.

A spokeswoman for the PM said: ‘Obviously Boris wants to express his support and what better way to do that, than awarding them with a commemorative badge saying, ‘Go Home’. This will be followed by the ceremonial firing of nurses out of a big catapult, over the Channel, back to where they came from.

‘It’s not that we are ungrateful, we’re just uncaring. To be honest, I’m just clapping to keep my hands from getting bored’.

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