The Labour Party today revealed its new slogan for the general election - “We know where you live”.
The slogan was announced during a party political broadcast, in which a menacing figure standing in the shadows, his face never seen, speaks to each viewer directly.
”George Matthews, we know all about that tweet you liked in 2021,” the figure told a terrified man in Oswestry. “And what you told your friends in the saloon bar of the Dog and Badger two years later.
“And we don’t think that attitude’s very helpful. We’d hate to have to have this conversation again at a later date. I’m sure you understand.”
Matthews immediately called Labour Party headquarters to ask how a TV broadcast could possibly have addressed him individually.
”They said it wasn’t possible, and I must have imagined it. But I could hear Peter Mandelson cackling hysterically in the background.”
image from pixabay