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Oil prices rise after we run out of dinosaurs

Opec+ have cut oil production, following the discovery that the Brontosaurus has stopped breeding. A spokesperson responded: 'We thought we had an unlimited supply of oil but that was based on the assumption that dinosaurs would last forever.'

New research suggests that dinosaurs may have died out as long ago as 2003. 'No one told us. I mean, would you notice if the Tyrannosaurus Rex disappeared from your garden? You just assume they're hiding with the hedgehogs.'

Opec+ rejected the accusation that they are trying to manipulate prices. 'Seriously, we think all the dinosaurs are gone. When was the last time you saw a Pterodactyl pecking through the top of your milk bottle, to get at the cream?'

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