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Satan shocked by Post Office actions



Satan, the Chair and Chief Executive of Hell, is shocked by the Post Office’s actions in prosecuting sub-postmasters and expressed sympathy with victims of the scandal and their families. 


He says that he originally believed that the British Post Office was managing the prosecutions ‘competently and honestly’. Over time, however, it became clear that they had ‘cocked it all up, big time’.


The Prince of Darkness sent us the following statement from his hotmail account.


‘I am shocked by the Post Office's actions in prosecuting so many innocent people. It is right that there is a public inquiry to investigate and I hope that their report will add to my limited understanding of what has happened.


‘When people pass on, I do get first dibs on anyone who has been to prison, or has a criminal conviction. I’ve been sent a number of sub-postmasters on this basis, but frankly, they have wasted my time. They were all good, kind and well meaning people – pillars of their community – and exactly the sort of folk that make me feel physically ill. There’s no way that I can let them into Hell. They would be a total buzz kill. I sent them all upstairs.'


Image: Photo by Vitaliy Shevchenko on Unsplash

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