Trump v BBC law suit will likely force some changes in programming

'We've entrusted the BBC's governors to oversee our defence against President Trump's libel suit,' said a spokes-antenna for the corporation, 'and that almost definitely means we'll lose the case and have to pay him a fortune.

'With that in mind," continued the spokes-cheque, "we're replacing our regular TV schedule with an exciting new economy line of programmes.

'East Enders will be replaced with Ceased Enders, where viewers can watch scene shifters take apart the set on Albert Square so it can be flogged to Sky.

'Top Gearbox will see the madcap team go to a Unipart warehouse to compare gearboxes for price and quality.

'There'll be Dr Who Can Lend Us A Fiver and our new charity fundraiser, Corporation in Need.

'And everyday we'll be screening an exhilarating new psycho-drama called Transmission Test Card, featuring a girl playing noughts and crosses with a creepy clown doll.

'We're expecting the whole of Britain to be riveted to their screens, waiting for him to come to life and draw a nought.

Traitor - live coverage via smartphone of the internal enquiry into who edited the Panorama footage of Trump's speech

Unfortunately, we can't give you any more examples of new cut price programmes but others believed to be under consideration are.

Corporation In Need

Ronnie Barker in Open on Tuesday Afternoons Only

Physician Assistant Who

Race Across The Isle of Wight Celebrity Love Handles

The Only Show

Celebrity Race to the Bus Station Gone Fly Tipping

Shoplifting in Paradise

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