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Writer's pictureSarah Tipper

Tumble dryers wondering why they've been ostracized




Inactive tumble dryers are sitting wondering why they no longer get to accept big mouthfuls of damp washing and make them all toasty warm and dry for the humans they live with. Having been entrusted with making towels fluffy for years they are now witnessing the same towels being hung outside on a line with olden days wooden pegs, like some kind of how we used to live re-enactment project or being hung indoors, metres away from them, over an item of furniture called a clothes horse which is not very horsey.


Tumble dryer Roundy McSpinnerson thinks the humans might have forgotten they own him, which is what happened to the steam mop, the ice cream maker and the rice cooker which live on the shelf above. Roundy can see the smalls of the humans he lives with and some of them have gone saggy and a bit discoloured. He thinks this might be a metaphor for Brexit. All the socks are taunting him because he cannot take his one sock sacrifice now they dry lined up in pairs away from his gaping maw. His humans look a bit crumpled because he was good at removing creases from their garments but maybe they now want crunchy, creased clothes and inconvenience.


Roundy used to enjoy the tickling sensation of the fluff he’d created being removed from his innards. He hopes one day to have this attention again.


Photo by Ben Wicks on Unsplash

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