UK Home Secretary, James Cleverly, has announced a deal with Iceberg A23a to process illegal immigrants coming to the UK in "Small Boats". The iceberg, a massive 280m deep and has a landmass twice the size of London, was carved from the Antarctic coast in 1986 and is about to drift beyond the reaches of the Continent.
'This Conservative Government has yet again come up with a deal that is innovative, humane, value for money and a clear deterrent", said Mr Cleverly, "The iceberg is completely free of people and is run entirely by some very enterprising Polar Bears whose only requirement was a steady supply of Meat and Fish. We will ensure they get this in abundance saving millions for the British taxpayer.'
Mr Cleverly also went only to say that Human Rights concerns are baseless as Polar Bears are not human and are therefore exempt from it's purview.
A spokesbear growled, "This is a great deal as our needs are simple, we want meet and fish and you have plenty to send us."
Photo by Hubert Neufeld on Unsplash