The book contains favourites like ‘Freshly Squeezed Shit Drippings’ and ‘A Lizard’, and includes no nonsense instructions such as, ‘First, find some shit; fresh is best’ and ‘Grab it, grab it before it gets away’. [read...]
Jim Nelson, an office worker in Farringdon, decided against placing his usual Starbucks order of creamy Mocha Hazelnut Frappuccino plus a giant Smarties cookie as part of a desperate attempt to impress the coffee shop’s new 23-year-old employee whom he described as ‘the heart-stopping girl of my dreams’. [read...]
The Lib-Dems will sensationally reposition its self today in Glasgow by re-launching itself as a Boy Band.
The Band will be known as ‘All Directions’ in line with current party thinking. [read...]
Householders have been warned to ‘stay indoors and keep away from the internet’ by government experts worried about the dangers of information. Considerable amounts of information have escaped since the Freedom of Information Act came into law and much of it is potentially hazardous to the general public. [read...]
For centuries, the Kung bushmen from the deserts of southern Namibia have known what to do if a drought threatened their crops: dance in clockwise circles while improvising harmonic chants on a flat place at the edge of the village to implore the sky gods for rain. [read...]
