Google’s attempt to map the surface of the Earth for smartphone users to access half a dozen times then ignore, is near to completion. The project has been largely successful except for mapping the United Kingdom, [read...]
A man and woman found unconscious in Wiltshire may have come into contact with, what chemists are describing as a compound made from ‘Voldemort’s nose, Freddy Krueger’s finger nails and Nigel Farage’s bile duct’. The noxious substance is so deadly that it could destroy all life as we know it, [read...]
Contrary to popular misconception, these insights will not be high-resolution views of pubs; those are of course merely inn-sights. This new piece of mega-expensive high-tech kit will give the scientific community – and thus eventually us riffraff – [read...]
Angry people across the UK have lifted their knuckles from the ground and demanded answers as to why there is apparently a shortage of carbon dioxide for drinks plants, when scientists and other lefties have been telling them for years that the world is getting hotter because there is too much of it. [read...]
Tim Peake’s insistence on self-reflection after his six-month space journey, nearly two weeks after landing back on earth, is increasingly looking like a tactic to avoid household tasks, confirmed his family today.
‘To begin with, [read...]