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ScienceBiscuit

Google moves into analogue market with launch of Google ‘Pen’

Google penThe pen uses motion sensors and sophisticated algorithms to capture the user’s movements when writing, then translates them into readable digital data.

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Internet to become literate by 2023

complaints should be sent to big@phall.usIncredible new developments in the world of computing suggest that it might actually be possible to spell things correctly and feature real punctuation in email addresses and URLs later this century.

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‘Imagine a world without free porn’, says blacked-out Wikipedia

Wikipedia's biggest audience everThe organisers of the online encyclopedia Wikipedia have warned web surfers that proposed legislation in the US may take us ‘back to the dark ages’ when it was necessary to pay to see women’s breasts.

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Hybrid shark offers excellent fuel efficiency

‘Previous attempts at carbon-neutral sea-life have had poor battery lives. But a fully-charged a hybrid shark would be able to travel up to 800km before needing to chomp on a surfer’s leg.’

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Professional footballers eagerly await release of Office Manager 2012

Theo Walcott dreams of nothing but paperclips all day long‘After the drudgery of training, playing, dating beautiful women and being pursued by the paparazzi, it’s great to escape into the world of purchase orders, staff rotas and VAT returns,’ said Theo Walcott. ‘It’s what every young boy dreams of.’

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