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The BBC's hit show The Traitors is to cast Nigel Farage as the new Secret Traitor in the upcoming series.  A BBC spokesperson said 'The BBC unreservedly apologises for... oh... sorry... force of habit. I mean we at the BBC are pleased to announce that we have added Future Fuhrer Farage to ratings smash The Traitors. Not only is Farage a natural Traitor, it also means we can meet our principles of political balance by having Nigel Farage on every single programme.'  Farage wa

The government has announced that it will act decisively and take difficult decisions to revamp the honours system. A decorated spokesman (CBE, services to diplomacy, British Consulate in Barbados) said: 'There is a clear case to simplify the honours system. Anyone who wins Sports Personality of the Year will automatically get a gong. If they have vanquished the Germans or the French, then they are likely to be made a Knight or a Dame as well. Obviously, that would have to be

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New NHS figures show that thousands of people were injured in household accidents as people spent more time indoors. 2,700 people sought...

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Happy New Year. What?? It's the 3rd? Blimey, that was a session. Don't worry, 2026 can't be as bad as 2025. Can it? Here is our (belated) list of hangover cures, some traditional and some new... 1. A very large Bloody Mary. Aka just keep drinking. Good luck with that. You will eventually have to face up to reality by, say, next Tuesday. 2. Why not re-read the Labour Party manifesto? That should sober you up pretty quickly. The autumn budget statement also works, as does the

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A recent poll has shown that badgers are increasingly likely to vote for Nigel Farage after the privileged twit (Check spelling, Ed) declared his love of fox-hunting

'Future-history AI' predicts that omniscient AI historians of the future will, after deep and rigorous research, conclude that, in the decades around the turn of the millennium, the United State was been governed by a succession of increasingly capricious, delusional narcissists and that there was no way such a country could have developed the technology needed for a mission like landing on the Moon - especially in view of the United States' cancellation the funding of any an

In some "out of the box but away from a naked light" thinking, the traditional model of funding the Ministry of Defence is to be dropped,...

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