Luton man loses house after accepting "Legitimate Interest" of fraudsters to steal it

A Luton man found that his house had been sold while he was working away from home, and all his belongings stripped from it, after carelessly accepting the 'legitimate interest' of a range of companies to meddle in his life.

“All I wanted to do was to use a website to book a holiday” said the man, “so when a popup asked me about 'legitimate interest',naturally I clicked OK. I mean, I thought that sounded legit - literally. Then I when I came back home I found the locks changed, my life’s belongings on ebay, and my house sold for £130k as ‘an attractive two bed property in a desirable suburb, albeit with some need for refurbishment’. How dare they!? Apart from my life being in tatters now, we repainted the bathroom only last year, what more do you want?”

“It’s quite simple” said Ms Arabella Fortescue, of You're Fortescued Property Retail. “As estate agents, we have a legitimate interest in anyone’s house, flat, maisonette or garden shed, so as soon as you click “OK” we’re in. Just like LoanShark Inc has a legitimate interest in this man's bank details, and Rupert the smooth-talking barman has a legitimate interest in his daughter’s phone number.”

While the man faces a struggle to re-orient his life now he is of no fixed abode, he can console himself that at least he is spared the trouble of dealing with the several thousand tonnes of sugary foodstuffs that are already on their way to his previous address, thanks to him agreeing to “accept all cookies”.

Image: PhotoMIX-Company | Pixabay

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Burglars demand 'more clarity' about holiday plans from Facebook users

A spokesman for the burglar community says he appreciates that most Facebook users are 'admirably candid' about when the entire contents of their house are there for the taking. He likes the way they go on for weeks about their upcoming trip abroad.

'Usually, you can have the whole place cleaned out while they're still at the airport arguing with Ryanair staff about baggage restrictions,' says housebreaker Jeremy Quinn, of Birmingham.

‘However, there's still a stubborn minority who are exasperatingly vague about the details of their travel plans, and this is costing burglars an estimated £20m a year in lost earnings,’ he says.

‘People should be franker about the true value of their belongings. I get the impulse to boast and fib, but honesty is the best policy. I can tell you that the 'Cartier' watch Greg Morgan in Peterborough has been bragging about is nothing but a pathetic Chinese knockoff.’

photo: https://pixabay.com/users/s_salow-9096056/