A spokesman for the Prime Minister has provided a press release confirming that the PM will be joining Reform 'sometime soon, probably before the next election.' He said Starmer had paid Nigel Farage for membership already, apparently they were next to each other waiting to vote on something and Farage accepted £23 'for cash'. The PM, apparently had been waiting for an opportunity to do it, but never seemed to catch the Reform leader in the House of Commons that often and despite travelling a lot, couldn't match Farage's travel plans.
'He doesn't agree with Reform's policies, such as they are,' the spokesman said, 'but he liked the idea of not having to turn up for work much, getting away with bare-faced lying and is yet to be approached by Russia for an off-the-books contract just for saying words that aren't hurty to Putin,' he added. Apparently his work ethic might be an issue, he's only ever held one job at a time, let alone 12 or 13, and has an unfortunate habit of not copying whatever Trump, for example, says. 'I'm sure it's just a training issue,' said the spokesman, agreeing that Farage is unlikely to be arsed providing it.
Urgent Update: The spokesman for the Prime Minister has apologised for issuing a press release produced using AI. 'Apparently the AI language models aren't fully up to speed yet and the one an aide used has been trained largely on satirical websites,' he said. So that's alright then, as you were and don't believe press releases. Especially if they use NewsBiscuit to train on. Tsk.
