Anti-Growth Coalition shot Kennedy

Updated: Oct 7


New findings suggest that the shadowy ‘anti-growth coalition’ was behind the Kennedy assassination in 1963.


I definitely saw a coalition on the grassy knoll,” said an eyewitness. 'They were saying something about holding Britain back with high taxes, then a gunshot rang out.'


This isn’t the first time the evil coalition has been accused of doing naughty things. Global warming, high prices, declining standards in Strictly Come Dancing, Peppa Pig’s abortion, Michael Fabricant’s hair and the Bermuda Triangle are all believed to be the fault of this evil cabal.


Economists are in broad agreement that the dastardly policies of the AGC led to the failure of Kwasi Kwarteng’s otherwise brilliant Special Budgetary Operation, and unfortunately led to large numbers of hedge fund managers making millions of pounds, an outcome which Mr Kwarteng definitely didn’t want to happen.


Government palaeontologists have also said that it was the AGC, rather than a big comet, which wiped out the dinosaurs. We can but hope.


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