top of page

Congress votes to arm all schoolchildren by 2025

Reeling from the atrocity of yet another mass shooting in a school, the US authorities have ruled that all schoolchildren from grade 1 upwards will be required to carry arms 'as a purely defensive measure'. This follows legislation pushed through to arm all teachers 'and some teaching assistants - you can't be too careful' this week in the wake of the mass killings. The arms for teachers would be automatic rifles, confirmed a Congress spokesman adding, 'when you've got a stroppy four year old throwing crayons around, a side arm just isn't going to work.'

'We're concentrating on the three Rs for our children, of course,' said a school principal in Minnesota today. 'Rifles, Rounds and Ricochets,' he added.

144 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All

Biden proposes free eye care bill

Following the attempted assassination on Donald Trump, Joe Biden is proposing a bill that would give all citizens free eye tests & glasses for those who own firearms. He stated “Until fire arms are ba


bottom of page