top of page

Football team refuses to play without their own reality TV series

Plucky, non-league Havant & Waterlooville FC are said to start the season with no major transfers and a complete absence of a 12-part Netflix serial, voiced over by the lovely Sir Patrick Stewart. Said the Manager: 'Obviously it's disappointing. Pre-season training had been going so well, with the team's make-over. hair stylists and intensive Stanislavski techniques.'

The players have gone on strike until a celebrity investor or rags-to-riches narrative can be secured. Said one player: 'I didn't get into the football to kick a football around. I did it for the real-life dramas, the spin-off Youtube channel and 15 minutes on the Graham Norton Show.'

Havant is one of only three teams this season not to have its own documentary, even Luton has one - called 'The Last of Us'. It also means fans will be forced to attend games in person, one game at a time. Remarked one fan: 'I'd normally sit on my sofa and binge the whole season in one weekend.'

58 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All

Clacton relieved Farage is going to Trump's aid

Despite having one of the highest crime rates in the UK, more unemployment than most constituencies, longer waiting lists for the NHS than practically anywhere the good people of Clacton have responde

Radical re-financing plan for Thames Water

Thames Water is saddled with billions in debt and shareholders will not provide any more cash for the deeply challenged company. Upgrading water pipes, stopping leaks, and preventing sewage spills wil


bottom of page