Harry and Meghan win 2026 Posh & Becks Prize
'They never do or say anything particularly interesting, but the pair of them turn up for a couple of hours in a dreary East Midlands city and for some reason they're on the front page of every newspaper in the UK,' said a spokes-drone for the Surbiton-based Posh N Becks Prize Committee.
'That's what's so David and Victoria about them, along with their ability to hog the limelight by having tasteless family quarrels in public, and it's why we are awarding Harry and Meghan our uncoveted Posh & Becks Prize.'
'The failing Duke and Duchess of Socksex should hand their Pish & Bucks Prize to me,' posted an envious US President Donald Trump. 'I'm even more useless, vain and attention-seeking than any of those guys.'
Foreign Office mandarins were having behind-the-scenes discussions with the Posh & Becks Society, trying to persuade them to hand their prize to Trump and spare Surbiton the risk of being carpet bombed and suffering dozens of pounds worth of damage.
