Having gone on TV to explain that he would ditch any promise he made, in order to get elected, voters might be forgiven for thinking that Sir Keir has only a passing relationship with the truth.
Delegates at the recent Labour conference were offput by the sight of Sir Keir making further pledges, with his fingers crossed. Said one delegate: ‘I don’t know who to trust? He says his name is Keir, but everyone else calls him Keith’.
Promising McDonalds’ workers £15 an hour, than instructing Andy McDonald to forbid it, was confusing - partly because of the broken commitment but mainly because everyone in the story was called McDonald.
A psychologist explained: ‘The odd thing is that no one asks him to make these pledges in the first place, he just seems to like breaking them – it’s sort of kinky. It’s like cheating on your spouse at the dinner table. He seems to get a thrill from being caught’.
An aide defended the beleaguered leader: ‘Keir is as honest as the day is long. Which is why Labour is proposing to help workers, with a new one-hour week’.
