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Man watching all women’s World Cup still claiming it’s crap

A man who’s glued to the women’s football World Cup insists that the quality of football is terrible and that he’d rather be watching literally anything else Keith Wilson has taken a month off work – not to watch the World Cup, obviously, but simply because it’s the summer holidays. “Yeah, the fact that this women’s World Cup thing is on while I have loads of time to watch telly is just a coincidence,” he explained.

“I’m actually being forced to sit through all these tedious, amateurish matches because there’s nothing else to watch. I suppose I could try finding something on Netflix, or Disney Plus, or even Amazon Prime, but who can be bothered to do all that scrolling at six o’clock in the morning?

“And yes, I’m normally up at that time during the summer - I can never sleep on these light mornings. It just so happens that the footie is on in Australia, so the time difference means that’s what I have to watch when I get up. It’s not like I specifically set my alarm or anything! “But the quality of this women’s football… My god, it’s atrocious. It’s supposed to be the beautiful game but it’s more like… um, the ugly game I reckon.

“The goalkeeping is particularly bad. The way the Australian goalie fumbled the ball in the 54th minute against Denmark… Jesus! It’s basically like watching a bunch of eleven year old boys, but in slow motion. “I’ll be glad when it’s all over and I can take down all these England flags and get back to watching proper football. Honestly, I have never filled in a World Cup wallchart with this much contempt.”

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