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North Shropshire to collectivise farms and declare a socialist republic

North Shropshire, an area where interests include tractors, ploughing, Brexit and incest has now morphed into a hot bed of left-wing activism. It threw off the yoke of two centuries of Tory oppression by electing a Liberal Democrat MP.

In turn, Lib Dems are celebrating that they no longer get chased out of the area by scythe-wielding Young Conservatives and that they may soon need a slightly bigger minibus to fit all their Westminster MPs in.

Local Lib Dem activist Eleanor Evans wore a beret and shouted through a megaphone ‘Comrades, it’s time to seize the means of production. We will collectivise the farms, we will energise the proletariat into continuous revolution to overthrow the bourgeoisie for the greater glory. You have nothing left to lose but your gilets.’

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