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Tories take Islamophobia 'extremely seriously'

Senior Tory MPs have claimed to be working extremely hard on Islamophobia.

One said 'There's no shortcut to success. I've spent 10,000 hours hating Muslims thanks to a solid diet of Daily Mail and Express articles. Sometimes even the comments sections. Now I'm not just a bigot, I'm a world class bigot!'

A second chimed in 'The only manufacturing sector we want to encourage is outrage. My constituency is a no-go area with Sharia law. Well, there might be a kebab shop opening anyway. And the area's racial make up is whiter than a Klan rally.'

A third stared into the distance before slamming his drink down dramatically. He growled 'I've served in the Culture Wars. Seen things you civilians can't imagine. Whipping people into a frenzy of irrational Islamophobia is the Conservatives only hope of winning the next election! '

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