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Antipodean entrepreneur in talks to buy the BBC

Updated: Jan 23, 2022

It is understood that Nadine Dorries has been considering an offer from Bertie B*llocks. The owner of the eponymous conglomerate already owns a movie streaming service and various news outlets around the world. Although some of his money making ventures fall into a "grey area", especially in China and South America, he will have the funds to maintain the necessary cash stream for the BBC to continue being a world-leading broadcaster.

A close associate of Mr B*llocks stated, "it's a win win situation. Hell, we won't even have to change the lettering of the logo".

Asked if there would be job cuts he said, " Oh, yeear. A lot management barsterds will jumping out of windows by the time Bertie is finished with them".

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