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Boris weighs resignation options

Boris has been thinking long and hard about the circumstances in which he would stay on and in which he would resign. Being found guilty of murder is almost certainly a resignation issue, as are any treason offences (high, medium or low).

Things that are not to be resigned over include fixed penalty notices, speeding fines, littering, sounding horn in a built up area after 10pm, shoplifting, breaches of the peace, pieces of the breeches, breaches of the ministerial code, mendacity, repetition, hesitation, repetition and deviation (up to a point).

The grey areas - might resign, might not - include the bodily harms (actual, grievous), assault (common, with a deadly weapon), bigamy, trigamy, failure to pay maintenance.

Finalising these lists is subject to further work with focus groups.

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