Keir Starmer Wins BAFTA for Best Actor in U-Turn: The Movie
- Oshaughnessy
- 5 minutes ago
- 1 min read
Hollywood was left stunned last night as world-leading thespian-activist and part-time grey suit mannequin Keir Starmer swept up a BAFTA for Best Actor in 'U-Turn: The Movie', a political thriller praised for its special effects and total disregard for plot consistency.
Gliding down the red carpet with the confidence of a man who has never met a position he couldn’t reconsider, Starmer reportedly asked whether Wunmi Mosaku was 'one of the smaller Chagos Islands,' before advisers gently turned him 180 degrees and pointed him toward the photographers instead.
The film opens with a blizzard of pledges before pivoting into a graceful montage of reversals on winter fuel, WASPI women, grooming gangs and digital IDs –proving once and for all that the only red line is the one being quietly rubbed out.
Critics have called it 'the first political drama filmed entirely in post-production.'
His line, 'These are tough decisions,' already rivals cinema’s greats for emotional ambiguity.
Accepting the award, Starmer thanked 'everyone who believed in change,' before clarifying that by 'change' he meant small coins.
Image: mark1657 - Pixabay
