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No future for Surfers For Sewage

The Surfers For Sewage group is to wind up, citing difficulties in signing up new members and in organising group activities.

The group is widely suspected of being entirely funded by water companies, who are desperate to put a positive spin on sea water polluted by human and animal excrement.

Membership of Surfers For Sewage peaked at around eighty, with many of these thought to be water company staff who thought they were going on an awayday. Group events included surfing the best of the white waters and the brown waters in Cornwall. However, gastroenteritis took its toll and membership has now fallen to four, all of whom are salaried members of the board.

Colin ‘Curly’ Brown, the membership secretary, admits that the group had a difficult task. 'It's a difficult job to promote sewage. We are undeterred, but when we faced a motion to wind up we knew that we were a busted flush. We did some good things, but now it's all down the pan.

‘Our Brown Flag initiative was a lot less successful than we'd hoped. And sales of Surfers For Sewage T-shirts and wet wipes were poor. On the plus side, we nearly won an Export Award by mistake, and we did actually win a Darwin Award.’

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