Peter Mandelson mildly threatens UK government with inferior biscuits

Peter Mandelson, the emperor of smarm, has exposed himself again. 

This time, it's in favour of already tragically wealthy overseas chums, at the expense of the ever grubbily fingered public purse. Tightening the genital screws on poor, put upon, hardworking Brits, a beaming grimace in softly spoken Rees-Moggian tones suggested that American billionaires should 'mildly threaten' the Treasury to tax them less than zero. Especially during periods of global financial crashes.

It's unclear if the promise to 'mildly threaten' would be a precursor to 'charmingly bludgeon'. The whispering menace prompted some discomforting thoughts:

If you don't do what I say, this dressing gown will slip open a little further;

Your lovely daughter's pony Cherubina could be clippy-clopping ungracefully at next week's gymkhana;

While you're not looking, your luxuriant, velvety bourbons might be replaced with inferior digestives;

Nice Horse Guards address... it would be a shame if someone decorated it less tastefully;

And if you do not tippy-toe more carefully, I may arrange a supper date for you with Michael Gove.

Image credit: perchance.org