This weekend UK will be hotter than the sun

The UK has gone into hot weather hysteria as excitement builds towards this weekend’s hot spell. It began on Thursday evening when Tomasz Schafernaker was rushed to hospital muttering “80 centigrade, 80 centigrade, that’s unheard of”. Darren Bett was spotted frying an egg on the bonnet of his BMW and Helen Willetts cast aside her normally calm and measured demeanour to declare that next week the UK will be hotter than the sun.

Of course, there is a serious side to these unusual weather episodes. When the temperature tops 100 degrees Celsius cattle are liable to evaporate, while rising sea temperatures have meant the Reformberg in the Arctic is on the move and is expected to slide into Makerfield in mid-June, depending on traffic. The UK will also experience its first ‘flameicane’, which is like a hurricane but with fire instead of wind, great for barbecues though keep your distance.

There are fun events too. In London the BBC’s Louise Lear and Sarah Keith Lucas will be among guests at Stav Danos’ place for My Big Fat Greek Weather Forecast, to which all viewers are invited. It promises to be quite a party. Bring on the high pressure, yay!

imge from pixabay