Americans confused by ugly children
Matt Gronier, a 56-year old from Kentucky, has expressed his 'disappointment and confusion' that the $155,000 invested in him by his parents to replace his teeth and eliminate his bald patch has not been passed genetically to his two children Scott and Mandy.
As Matt says: 'When Scott was born he clearly had issues feeding from his mother's 42DDD boobs, as her cosmetic surgery got in the way. Perhaps it would have been easier with her natural 34C. But to make up for it we fed him on liquefied McDs and full-fat coke. This worked fine until he hit 25 stone at the age of 13. As responsible parents we started him on GLP-1s and a muzzle, and he lost 14 stones. For some reason I cannot fathom, Scott also had buck teeth and a bald batch, so I knew it was time, as a responsible parent, to take action, and book him in for surgery.
'To say Mandy looked like a cross between John Wayne and Bill Murray would be an injustice to both men. But with the help of our surgeons she eventually looked like her mom, though obviously with 48DDD bboobs. The dental surgery was also quite expensive at $95,000 but the investment was worth it.
'I can now proudly say that none of our grandchildren will look ugly'.
Image: ChatGPT
