US General admonished for not returning with 'whole of Venezuela'
- Steveb
- 1 day ago
- 1 min read
American President and unhinged Kmart trolley Donald Trump threw a wobbly when US military forces returned from a mission without the entirety of Venezuela.
Respected political analysts have been nodding in agreement that the President had made it clear that he wanted all of Venezuela brought to the White House and placed on the Oval Office desk next to his breakfast Bigly Mac. And then all of that painted gold and instantly flown to his bed in Mar-a-Lago on the back of a swan in time for wakey-wakeys.
'Returning with just the President of Venezuela and his wife is unacceptable,' barked US Chief of Strategic Fox Newses. 'If you send your top guys in to take a country, then they better goddamn well come back with that country.
'General MacGyver needs to get his ass back over there with a bigger bag this time. A bit of Caracas and Angel Falls ain't gonna cut it. It has to be the whole lot, including all the oil underneath.
'The scale of this operation cannot be misunderestimated.'
Doctors paid to insist Trump is mentally stable have confirmed that only the President is genius enough to know that the outline of Venezuela will fit in the star-shaped hole.