First Minister defends World Cup expenses

John Swinney, SNP first Minister of Scotland, today defended his and his staff's almost £100,000 bill for visiting the US to watch Scotland play in the World Cup against Haiti. He pointed out that the trip also included a trade mission to Kentucky.

Although Kentucky is nowhere near Boston, he insisted that he had done no wrong.  'Myself and my team were representing Scotland at the Scotland football match in Boston prior to the trade meeting in Kentucky. I think the fact that Scotland won is testament to the good work that the SNP government does in governing Scotland.'

He was then pressed about the fact that he and his staff travelled business class at a cost of over £45,000 in breach of the government's own travel rules. He responded by saying in a rather huffily manner, 'Well, if we had been allowed to keep our motorhome, it would have been a lot cheaper.'

When asked how the trade mission to Kentucky went, he replied, 'Well, we got a couple of bottles of bourbon as gifts, and very tasty it was too.  After we, er, sampled the bourbon, uhm... we... well, I guess we talked.  And sung.  Yes!  I remember lots of singing.'

Image credit: ChatGPT