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NASA design new spacesuit specially for fatcats

NASA has announced the first prototype of a new spacesuit. According to a spokesman, the new suit “recognises the realities of our new hybrid-funding model, where civilians travel alongside our trained astronauts, in return for an appropriate fee".

"Civilians in space create particular design challenges which our staff have worked hard to overcome. The suit, code-named Jabba*, has the following features:

• extended flexibility in the abdomen area;

• additional filters to allow the person to smoke large cigars; and

• further pressurization to allow significant amounts of carbonated alcoholic drinks to be imbibed on-board.

A further modification involves special adaptation to the visor to reduce the likelihood of psychological episodes when the wearer realises they may be significantly smaller than the universe, apart from their egos, obviously.”

The spokesman concluded, “we are very pleased with what we’ve achieved with Jabba and hope that further high-achieving individuals will consider co-funding one of our next missions. Details of our secure credit card portal are on our site. Unfortunately we don't accept PayPal or Virgin gift vouchers,” he added.

Notes to Editors:

1. *Jointed Abdominal Ballistic Body Armour

2. Please do not refer to “fatcats” or other derogatory terms for the wealthy, as it may jeopardise our future funding

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