NATO asks for a war for Christmas

The Head of NATO said he was super excited to get play with Action Men figures, once his wish for WWIII comes true. Singing a rendition of O Come All Ye Soldiers and Jingle Shells, he declared that Europe must go to war with Russia, if he is to meet his appraisal targets.

He said Santa’s Shock and Awe would ensure that Slay Bells Ring, while he encouraged all NATO members to Deck the Halls with Boughs of Ammo. When asked if he thought a winter offensive would be a good idea, he said everyone loves a white Xmas in Moscow—just ask Napoleon.

He was confident that Noel of Duty would work, just like Syria, Libya had been stellar successes. He said "Santa's bound to have a list of whose naught and nice. Who has oil, minerals, what Blackrock needs. All of these will factored in. What I can sure is that everyone will get a bit of Ukraine in their stocking—apart from the Ukrainians. They won't even get to keep a lump of coal."

image from pixabay