Russian Government denies involvement in the Opal Fruits/Starburst name change

A spokesman for Vladimir Putin has categorically refuted the claim that it was Russian interference which resulted in Opal Fruits changing their name to Starburst in 1998. Despite evidence uncovered by UN investigators and the CIA, the bare-chested, horse-riding, journalist-culling, yet democratically-elected dictator denies any State involvement.

"Russia has always denied being involved in this tragedy" our reporter was told. "It is more western propaganda designed to make the Russian State look bad, and believe me, we don't need any help on that front."

Western researchers have discovered that two KGB agents were operating in Slough in the late '90s, disguised as tourists. The men involved claim they were just tourists and proved this by showing photographs of them outside the Queensmere Observatory Shopping Centre, the Slough Ice Arena and admiring the tower of the historic St Ethelbert’s Church.

This is not the first time a foreign power has been accused of such underhand dealings. The Israeli government still denies any MOSSAD involvement in Marathon becoming Snickers in 1990.

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