TV execs defend decision to show man’s cognitive decline

In one of the cruellest examples of public exploitation a 79 year old man’s cognitive decline has been broadcast worldwide despite obvious signs that his mind is wandering.

'It’s human interest TV’, one exec told NewsBiscuit. ‘We need to take dementia out of the closet and show the world what to watch out for. When we started this series, Don was mildly impaired. As time has gone on his condition has inevitably worsened. It’s a cruel disease but makes compelling TV. The ratings are out of this world’.

Don’s children fiercely defend the decision to put him on national television. ‘He always loved the limelight’, one told us. ‘He used to have his own TV show. Yes, really. Hard to believe but this drooling imbecile used to have real clout’.

The TV stations give Don hours of airtime which he spends rambling about the ocean - sharks eating plastic straws, windmills making whales crazy, the benefits of electrocution at sea compared with shark attacks. He also insults foreigners, egged on by a group of carers who sometimes join in – and fantasises about winning a Nobel Prize. In one episode he was handed a phony ‘Peace Prize’ which he proudly displayed, looking increasingly like a Father Jack tribute act.

The last word should go to Don himself, while he still has speech: ‘I look at London where they have a terrible Mayor. Terrible, terrible Mayor. And it’s been so changed. So changed. Now they want to go to Sharia law. I guess they want to kill all the cows. We have a border, strong. And we have a shape. And that shape doesn’t just go straight up. That shape is amorphous, when it comes to the atmosphere’.

Wise words

Image: TheDigitalArtist - Pixabay

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