Updated: Dec 3, 2021
The Prime Minister appeared to distance himself from the majority of the British public by agreeing they weren't inherently corrupt, implying that those he didn't by nature distance himself from were, including but not necessarily limited to: Conservative MPs, Conservative donors, Conservative Party Treasurers, some blokes Johnson and his cabinet members met in a pub, his mates and anyone who had an island retreat to lend for a fortnight.
The government has promised to tackle corruption and will set up an enquiry that will be presided over by the highest bidders who will almost certainly receive a peerage in return for delivering the correct result. They will, of course, be handsomely paid and be allowed to work from home. Or the Bahamas, whichever pays the most.