Vampire budget protest

Vampires will picket Downing Street in a protest about the budget measures.

'We will picket from dusk till dawn,' said a spokesman. 'Unless Michael Howard turns up. Also not on Saturday or Sunday - that's a Vampire Weekend.

'Cutting tariffs on marmalade is fine and cutting tariffs on gherkins is funny, but reducing tariffs on garlic will cost lives. This could be a bigger disaster than the infected blood scandal.

'From one group of blood suckers to another, we implore the Chancellor to impose big, beautiful tariffs on crucifixes, wooden stakes and garlic.

Image: WixAI