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Woman buys house, lives in house, sells house, Tories furious

A woman has sold a house for a profit, a mere 17 years after buying it. This 'event' has provoked horror from leading Conservatives and several right-wing newspapers, because the woman is Angela Rayner - definitely the 'fun one' on a shadow cabinet girls night out.

Professional frother-at-the-mouther Clementine Carruthers salivated 'No self respecting Tory MP would only make 48k over 17 years from a house. Phil and especially Kirsty would have a fit. At the very least a Conservative MP would have claimed Parliamentary expenses for the second of two entirely fictitious moats, then have his hedge fund quadruple mortgage the place, then sell it to a Russian oligarch for a massive profit, then immediately buy it back from a Russian oligarch at a suspiciously knockdown price, then keep the money from a VIP lane multi-million pound PPE contract that a house obviously couldn't fulfil, then register the house as a limited company in the Bahamas, then declare that company bankrupt, then quintuple the rent at zero notice, in order to evict the young family who can no longer afford to live there, on to the street. And the cause of the fire that burned it all down afterwards was never found.' 

'Angela Rayner's behaviour - buying an ex-council house, living in the house, then selling it nearly 2 decades later - makes me physically sick. We just cannot tolerate this kind of social mobility. It will not do, to give the oiks hope, when it's our duty to crush their dreams and destroy their futures.'

'Anyway, women can't own property, can they? That's political correctness gone mad.'

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